Virgo:

"The uncertainty of your life could overtake your confidence, but you are able to cover any anxiety you may be feeling because your key planet Mercury conjuncts friendly Venus. Fortunately what you lose to fuzzy thinking, you gain in charm, creativity and social grace."

Heh, I hope so.

Five and Four

This was an excellent weekend.

For starters, I had The Boy to myself all weekend long (this doesn't happen often, by the way). Saturday's highlights include the purchasing of FANTABULOUS new boots, followed by a cozy nap, which preceded a small goodbye party for me at which I got incredibly drunk. You know I'm drunk when I start saying, "I'm SO drunk" a lot. I'm pretty direct about it, you never have to wonder. And in case you were wondering, I'm a very friendly drunk. VERY friendly.

The Boy got me home safe and sound, and when I drunkenly mentioned that I was starved, he made me pot stickers. Awwwwww! NOM. *zzzzz

Sunday began with sleeping in and lounging, and tasty brunch outside in the sun in Hayes Valley. We headed over to a slick travel store called Flight 001 to grab a few things I needed for my trip, and then hung out at Isotope (the coolest comic store you will ever go to) to say goodbye to our friends that own the store. We then lounged in the sun eating fancy ice cream in Dolores Park with some friends of ours.... the kind of friends that bring an acoustic guitar along in the interest of some half-ironic singing in the park.

The sun was lovely, but we had to cut our park time short because we had been given dual massages as a birthday gift! Yeay! I've never been to a real day spa before, and so it was quite a treat. I am still spacey from the massage. *sigh

Then, post-massage we had nummy foods and finally got to go see Tropic Thunder!

Now, at home. Tired. Feel oily from massage. Hungry for chocolate.

It was a good weekend.

Six

It's my last full Friday stateside.

Today was an okay day, actually. I spent the morning lounging around my boyfriend's house watching Battlestar Galactica (I'm only up to season 2.5) and doing laundry. I had a brief moment of panic when my mother informed me of a snafu in shipping my boxes o' stuff to London, but that was later cleared up.

My ex-room mate took me to see Spring Awakening tonight as a belated birthday and early going-away present. And it was AMAZING. Now, home with The Boy futzing around the house and playing stuff on xbox live.

Seven

Today I worked on repacking the couple of boxes that will be mailed to London in a few days. My mother was there to help me pack- an action that resulted in a series of arguments and general fighting.

Much fun was had by all.

I could use a drink and a good night's sleep.

Eight

I am stressed.

I feel manic. During good moments, I feel excited about the fact that next Sunday I will wake up in a new bed in a new city and will start a new life. But those moments are few today. I would be lying if I said that I was anything but stressed out right now.

Nine

Nine more days left.

It's so strange to think that in less than two weeks my entire life will be utterly changed.

For the most part I am okay about moving. I really am. I have my moments though, and they come quickly, without warning, hitting me hard in the chest at unexpected moments. But I'm learning to let them pass, and trying to focus on the good things.

There are so many good things. The next three years will be amazing and life-changing. I know that. I do.

And as long as I keep my focus where it should be- on making sure I take every opportunity to make these next three years as fabulous as possible- I will have a great time and learn a lot. About a lot of things.

Ten Hours of Staring

I wonder what my flight will be like on the 19th. I remember my red eye flight over there last fall and how I sat next to a balding, chubby man that I suspected of being very high at the time of takeoff.

The flight was almost ten hours long, over night (which in coach means you spend the nighttime hours making desperate promises to some deity that you will forever be a good person if he/she will only allow you a few hours of comfortable rest), and the plane was particularly loud. I brought my DSlite, a book my boyfriend got me, a mini-pillow, and a sketchbook. This man next to me brought absolutely nothing. Not a magazine, not a book, not a piece of paper, nothing...

He spent the entire ten hour flight staring at his hands with a look of utter amazement. First he'd examine the back of his hands, no doubt counting lines and following their paths around to the front of his hands, which he'd then stare at until he flipped them back again. His childlike fascination led me to believe that he was in fact watching the rise and fall of vast empires of little hand-dwelling germs. The pretty lights and goings-on of this tiny civilization must have kept his attention rapt for the entire ten hours that I was fussing in my seat trying to find a position that would lend itself to sleep, and still allow my subversive glances at my seat-mate to see if he was still in fact counting his pores.

Red for Red

Today my mother bought me my first set of luggage as a belated birthday present. It is red.

On Moving, and the Start of My 23rd Year...

I am almost moved out of my San Francisco apartment. September 1st will mark the beginning of my time surfing couches, and living out of the leather bag I carried with me to London the first time I went. (Hopefully I can skip most of the couches and stay at my boyfriend's place most of the time.)

Packing to move abroad is quite an experience. I've moved many times before, but never like this. I'm getting rid of most of my furniture and a large amount of my belongings. It's freeing to find yourself needing only the things in one or two boxes. I packed a box of books I want to take with me, as well as a box of my knick-knacks and whatnot that have special meaning to me. Other than that, I'm taking only clothes, some of my DVDs, and my sewing machine and computer. And that's it.

Today my room mates gave me a going away gift- they found an adorable change purse (which I will need for all those 1 and 2 pound coins in the UK) and filled it with pound coins they got exchanged for me. "To make sure you start your stay there with a little food and fun money," they said. I will miss my room mates. They are incredibly sweet guys.

I can't believe how fast time is going. September 19th is so close it's disgusting. And yet I'm surprisingly sane through all of this. Perhaps I'm simply in an advanced stage of denial, or maybe I'm finally coming to accept that I've made this decision and I have to see it through. And maybe I'm a little bit excited to start my life over. I think I am still a little sad too- I don't eat much and I can't sleep. But generally, I am okay (albeit a little thinner than usual).

Oh! I turn 23 next Tuesday. I've been so busy with the practical tasks I've had to take care of as I move that my birthday kind of snuck up on me. 23.... That was my dad's lucky number. It has a certain magnetic quality to it. I always knew that my 23rd year was going to be interesting in some way. Who knew, huh? Happy almost birthday to me!

As I am prepping to move, more and more people are talking to me about it. And it seems that everyone has a friend who's in London or in fashion design. I've had so many offers from friends of friends to show me around, or introduce me to other designers. It is very comforting to know that there are friendly people on that side of the pond, eager to meet me. I hope I become enough of a talented designer to make the most of all these new contacts.

The toughest thing I've been dealing with during this whole process is my relationship. Many an evening has been spent with my boy, talking about our future. It hasn't been easy on either of us. But my boyfriend and I have decided to give a long distance relationship a try for the first quarter. I am a little nervous about how well I'll deal with the separation, but I am willing to try it for him. He's been really great through all of my meltdowns, and indecisive drama. Not many guys would stick around through my emotional storms. It reminded me how amazing he is, and I decided to give this whole long distance thing a try.

And now I should return to my regularly scheduled "Throw Everything I Own Into A Box" programming....

Classes

Ok, school update: I found out that I am taking four classes my first quarter. I will find out what they are in a day or two, but I do know that I get to take a jewelery design course! I am thrilled! I wanted to take jewelery design at my last two art schools, but because I had declared a major they wouldn't let me. I'm EXCITED! I have an unbelievable desire to learn how to cast things in metal, and to design laser-cut metal pieces to incorporate into my fashion designs!